Coffee!

Ok this is just a short and sweet revelation I had today... Sometimes my relationship with God is like my relationship with coffee... So if you don't know me, I like coffee, not only that... if I don't have coffee in the morning, I don't function. There for I guess it would be safe to say that I need coffee daily. However, sometimes I get caught up in the need and the habit of drinking coffee that I forget to enjoy it; it just becomes another part of my day or just something to keep me going... Now this isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it can be. You see, today I had a cup of coffee, aside from the ordinary morning coffee, just to enjoy it...

Now here I see this in my relationship with Jesus, sometimes it's easy to get caught up in the habit of it rather than the joy. It's easy to just go to church, occasionally read my Bible, but not experience the joy that comes with it. I try to find the joy in God every time I pray, because otherwise I feel fake. And, like coffee, I depend on God for my survival (clearly God is more important than coffee though, i could live without coffee if it was absolutely necessary). But like I said, I want to enjoy God and feel His presence every time I pray or go to church or just all the time in my life, I never want to feel like it's a habit, like my actions were in vain...

Last thing I promise, I also wonder what my motive for drinking coffee is... Is it the delicious taste or the remarkable ability that caffeine gives me to stay up in the wee hours of the morning? This 'side effect', I'll cal it, is an added bonus, but it should not be the only reason I drink it. I should drink coffee to experience the scrumptious taste and thirst quenching abilities it has, not just the side effects... Like this, we should go to church for the pure joy and thirst quenching abilities of Christ. Yes, the community (yay for Ember!) could be a plus or a 'side effect' but that should not be our sole purpose of going...

That is all, yay for coffee!

ehhh

So I had/have a post in the works. I was extremely inspired over the weekend, but I didn't write it soon enough... My mood went from super high over the weekend, to a very ehh mood during the week. I feel like it would be insincere if I continued to write it now since my heart isn't in it... and I cannot stand people who are not genuine so I feel it would be a disservice to you all who read this to write if my heart isn't in it... So please pray for me, my mood and heart have been off this week. Ironically right when I could use God's presence, I turn away. Not that I haven't tried to let Him in, it just doesn't seem genuine in my heart... Idk its a weird feeling so please pray for me...thanks

Miss Melinda :)

Disclaimer: I realize this is the 3rd time this week that I've written... It might be excessive but at least I'm doing something! (And avoiding other things...)

There is an awesome lady who came to my mind this morning… She is my mom’s best friend and I know her as Miss Melinda. She is one of the most caring, loving, and fun people I know and has a personality the size of Alaska! (Haha that is a bad description.. point is her personality is huge and infectious!)

Anyway, when she visited this past summer, I got a chance to really hang out and talk with her. Before then, she was just known to me as my mom’s best friend and a nice lady who would visit us and who we would visit occasionally. It wasn’t until this trip though that I got to see the great heart she has for people. Not only does she have a giving heart, but she has such an encouraging heart as well. I see this through her stories of the kids she works with (she teaches high school English). She has such a great heart for teaching and encouraging students; they seem to really love her and I can see the love she has for them and the desire she has for them to succeed. I remember one story of a previous student she had who is currently in prison. She told me that she still corresponds with him and that he is an encouragement to others in prison. To know that she can encourage someone who then encourages others, it just shows how much of a difference she makes in peoples’ lives. She is also such a giving person, not only of her money but her time. During the week she was with us, she had a number of projects in the works; most were buying old pieces of furniture from goodwill and refurbishing them. She took her vacation time to help me and my family on these projects… Not only that, but Miss Melinda cared for my mom after she had surgery. Ultimately, if you knew Miss Melinda or even just had one conversation with her, you could see her joyous and loving heart shine through, and this joy is in fact infectious. Just thinking about her puts a smile on my heart. (Ok I realize this doesn’t fully explain what I’m trying to say… basically she’s awesome!)

One thing that stuck with me is this quote from her “Don’t love others in the way that you want to love them, love them in the way they need to be loved”. When she said this (in her cute Southern accent no less), it was like a “duh” moment. So many times we show love when WE want to show it and how WE want to show it, but what we should be doing is loving when OTHERS need it and in the way OTHERS need it. After all, that’s what love is about isn’t it? It is, or should be, something outside of ourselves, it’s our recognition that we need to think of someone other than ourselves for once. True love is unselfish, it even says it in the Bible (1 Cor. 13:5, “it is not self-seeking”). So when we love people, we need to take into consideration their needs instead of our own. This is so hard for me cuz so often I am stuck in my own little world (I call it “Lisa Land”) and am unable to see the big picture and the true need for love. Hopefully I can take this into consideration constantly when dealing with friends or even strangers.

To Miss Melinda, thank you so much for being you! The love you have for God and people seriously shows through, so I pray that God will continue to work in your life and that you may know what an inspiration you are to people. If I can turn out to be half the person you are, I know I will live a fulfilling life. So once again, thank you and I love you and hope that all is well in South Carolina!

Solid!

“We’re adults… When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?”
This is an epic quote from Grey’s Anatomy back in its glory days, around season 1 or 2. Well, at least I think its epic, I think a friend even sent me a piece of flair on facebook of this quote… it’s just THAT cool…

Anyways, do you ever just think back to an easier time when the extent of your drama was who got to sit in the front seat or who got to play with the best Barbie? It’s a time when you could play for hours with your friends on the playground of trampoline immersed in this exciting land or story full of games and the idea that you could be anyone you wanted to be…. this land of make believe. I get a taste of it every so often when I watch the kids at my job. The other day I was a pokemon fighting off an evil batman on the trampoline getting hit by a huge ball with pretend metal spikes on it. What a simple, typically fun-filled time in life childhood is… I see the boys reaching big milestones in life like tying their shoes and riding a bike on two wheels. Ahhh the beauty of childhood…

I remember though there comes a point when you grow out of it. The land full of imagination now becomes a land of reality. The times of inviting friends over to “play” become invitations to “hang out.” I think this tends to happen around junior high, I don’t know what brings us to it, maybe the new complexity of our school schedule or the beginnings of puberty. I do remember, however, my friends and I had one last “hurrah” I guess. It was me, my sister, my friend, and her older brothers. Me and my friend were just at the transitioning stage, but my sister and the boys were much older like in junior high. We play a super intense game of army at night. It was a good ending to our childhood. This is when responsibility and reality set it and things started to matter. The days of the milestones were over and now every decision you made seemed to begin to shape you into the person you are today.

I think it’s like this in our spiritual lives… no in fact I know it’s like this in our spiritual lives. There comes a point when we stop learning the basics and start learning to live it. When we grow from the AWANA definitions (i.e. grace is “something we don’t deserve” or the gospel is “the Good News”) to doing justice and submitting all that we are to His will. It all comes down to milk or solid food… Hebrews 5:13-6:1“Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil. Therefore, let us leave the elementary teachings about Christ and go on to maturity…”

I think the Phil Wickham song The Time is Now pretty much describes what I’m feeling….

“You’ve learned every song, memorized the verse,

Took the bread and wine,

and even bought the shirt,

It’s time.
It’s time to hold your shield,

It’s time to draw your sword,

Let’s lead the resistance,Oh Lord, oh Lord, oh Lord,

it’s time.

Yeah it’s time.

The time is now, for lifting souls.

The time is now, for letting go.

From your skin, to your core.

Let light, and love, come rushing through the door.”

The first section of this song is something I’ve really been struggling with… I’ve grown up in the church learned the songs, verses, etc. but it’s just hitting me what they mean and at times, I become numb to the words I’ve been taught for so long. I even tend to get a somewhat pompous attitude toward certain things that I’ve heard many times… I think oh I’ve heard this a lot, it doesn’t pertain to me, I can tune this out… but I shouldn’t, especially when I don’t take the time to fully appreciate what it means. Words like grace, Lord, Hosanna, Hallelujah… I’m gonna take the time now to reflect and explore the true meaning (FYI I am aware that this will be a super long post but my hope is you all will continue reading…) All definitions are from the dictionary:

Grace: “A favor rendered by one who need not do so”

It is so much more than that though, yes we are undeserving, yes God gave us grace, but the magnitude of grace is something I’ve been trying to understand but can’t, it’s just so powerful… The amount of love required, the pureness in which God’s grace is given is unfathomable to the flawed human consciousness. I think all of our actions are tainted with some sort of selfish motive, whether we like it or not it’s true. But God, His grace is so pure so far from selfishness it’s… um the only way that I can even attempt to explain is that every time I try to wrap my head around it I get this overwhelming sense of peace that rushes over my body. It’s a peace in knowing that I’m not meant to comprehend it, in knowing that God’s love for me to is so huge that I can’t explain it… Now I realize this does not explain grace very well, but I just want you know that it’s so much more than a clear cut definition…

Lord: “a person who has authority, control, or power over others; a master, chief, or ruler”

Yes this is true of God, He is in control of our lives, He does have a plan, but I think this definition or at least the words in this definition have a negative connotation in our lives… authority, control, power; they are all qualities that we want to have for ourselves and the recognition of these qualities in some other being require us to let go of our selfish tendencies and fully submit to someone other than ourselves… which I don’t know about you but I fail miserably at. Society tells us we need to be independent and rely on no one but ourselves, so this makes it hard to recognize Jesus as our “Lord.” When we say this word, we should say it in complete awe and adoration for God. We need to say this out of respect and insodoing we will fully submit to Him. With this word we become vulnerable to God and acknowledge that we are not our own. Again, I don’t know if I’m explaining this correctly or coherently but when I think about “Lord” another overwhelming feeling comes over me which shows me that the essence of the word is so much more than I can comprehend…

Hosanna: “Originally an appeal for deliverance; used in Christian Church as an ascription of praise, because when Jesus entered Jerusalem this was shouted by Galilean pilgrims in recognition of his messiahhood”

This one has always puzzled me cuz it’s in songs and everything but I’ve never really understood why we say it. I think this definition pretty much sums it up though… the rejoicing of Jesus and His delivering us from our sins… pretty self explanatory, but I just have to remember this when I say and you should too!...

Hallelujah: “a shout of joy, praise, or gratitude”

This again should be an overwhelming feeling… yes all of the words in the definition are appropriate but it’s so much more… Again it’s complete awe and respect and it’s the joy you feel from the complete knowledge of our Savior and again the gratitude… It encompasses everything that the Lord has done and the sheer joy and praise that one cannot help but feel as a result of God’s grace. Again it’s extremely hard to explain and this is the closest I can get but it’s something that I fail to remember and feel so often.


So after that long tangent, it’s one thing to know this stuff and understand the “milk” of our faith, but it’s another thing to feel it and live out the solid food. Like Phil Wickham says, the time is now. I want to live it out, I want to get away from the numbness of these words and feel it and pursue it daily. Now, I don’t know how to go about this, I can’t do it alone, so I need your help… let’s do this together guys! Who’s with me?!